Thursday, May 30, 2019

Update on Life

Hi, everyone! Sorry I didn't keep you posted on Sarah's
progress, but I didn't want to share anything till I knew for sure
if and when she could come home.

So, baby Sarah is home! She's been home for a few weeks. She
steadily, quickly grew healthy enough to leave the hospital-praise
God-. She is doing well and is so precious. She is a mix of Caroline
and George. I'll try to share pictures soon!

I know the blog's been quiet. I...I have so much that I want to say,
and some of it is hard to put into words. The passed two months have
been hard: family issues, communication, etc. (No, our family doesn't
have all the answers and we are far from perfect! We have problems same
as everybody else!) Some things are getting better-thank God-, but
there are some days where I just want a quiet place to think deeply. I miss
my mom. Yes, things were rough and tense close to the end, but still...she
and I shared so many things with each other. And the anniversary of her
death is coming up soon! And I had my first birthday without her.

We've been watching the Lord of the Rings series for the first time,
and honestly, it has inspired and encouraged us to be there for
each other and other people, and especially not to let the
darkness completely rule out our view of the light. In those
stories, things looked completely hopeless and all seemed
absolutely lost! But there was always someone who kept
reminding the characters, "There's always hope." They
couldn't see it at the time, but in the end they did. What they
had to do, was keep fighting, keep going, keep believing, and
NEVER give up, in despair! So, yes, this series has been a
blessing from God, and at the right time! I do want to share later
about one particular scene that I knew was from God, that He
showed me as a great comfort right now.

God is blessing my acting, and He has opened so many doors to
me since bringing me to my theatre group! Performing is so much
fun, but also a great way to express emotions and let out energy, which
I need right now! AND, it is a consistency in life that I need too. So,
yes, God is still good.

Dad, Ryan, and I went to Turkey Hill for the weekend. Annah stayed home
with our dog, Thea. She needed a break from everyone and did a lot of
much needed housework without everyone under foot! It was good to
be back at Turkey Hill, and Ryan had a blast, but I'm glad to be back home!
I had a real scare on Saturday. The life guard in the pool had to pull Ryan
and me back to the wall! I was swimming with Ryan, holding him, then I
dipped, just slightly, and he panicked and grabbed me by the neck. I was
trying to swim back to the wall, but he got more scared and kept grabbing me
tighter! He was clutching my neck so hard I couldn't swim properly. I was trying to
keep him above the water, but felt my strength giving out. Though I didn't really fall
under, it did come up to my ears and I felt like I couldn't stay up much
longer. Thank God the lifeguard came. He pulled us both back. Soon as Ryan
was back on solid ground, he ran off to play again. I was really shaken up.
I have felt scared before, many times, and terrified, but never like that!
I felt so shaky and my heart was racing like crazy. The nurse came out
and took a look at me, and tried to make sure I was calm. I could
breathe and speak, but my chest was racing almost like I've never felt
before. I got dressed and she monitored me a few more times in the evening.
My pulse and oxygen levels were a little lower than they should have been,
but I just tried to lay down a lot and get some rest so that really helped
bring them back up. I didn't go to chapel that night, I slept, and when I woke up
I felt reenergized at least mentally. Next day? Felt normal, thank God.
But that was so scary! I've never experienced fear like that. It was
like a bad dream, where I wasn't sure if we were going to make it out!
But God protected us and we're home now.

So, how is everybody else doing?